life with 2 under 2 {so far}

I haven't been the best blogger since our little man, Emmett, was born. So I thought I'd give you all some much needed updates!

We've been having appointments with Emmett's pediatric doctor and my lactation consultant every other day. He has been sloooowwwwlllyyyy gaining weight back. Today, he was up to 6 lbs 1 oz, which is no change from Wednesday and still eight ounces from his birth weight, but at least he's maintaining and not losing. While we were there, we did a weighed feeding, and he managed to get 20ml in about 15 minutes, which isn't as much as a full term baby would consume at the breast, but still not bad. Considering how rough things were in the beginning, with him not latching at all, we are all pretty happy with his progress. He is doing SOOOOOO much better with the help of the nipple shield. In fact, they now upped his time at the breast to 15 minutes per side before offering the bottle, which makes me happy. We are slowly but surely getting closer to our ultimate goal- exclusively breastfeeding.


Elliot is adjusting REALLY well to his new baby brother- much better than I expected, to be honest. He pretty much does his own thing most of the time (busy, busy toddler!) but he likes bringing me things for the baby- pacifiers, burp cloths, etc. I think he does it just to hear the enthusiastic "THANK YOU" afterwards, but either way, it's pretty cute. He also likes to poke Emmett and give him kisses. :)


I'm feeling GREAT! I don't even feel like I just had a baby, and always find myself doing things I'm not supposed to do {like picking up Elliot}. So far, I've already lost 21 of the 35 pounds I gained during my pregnancy, without trying. I gained 45 when I was pregnant with Elliot, and lost the weight quickly and easily, but I thought it would be harder this time around. Looks like I might have been wrong! Fingers crossed!



Emmett wakes up to eat about every two hours. We're cosleeping, so he never cries because I wake up right when he starts to stir. I absolutely love having a little baby to snuggle up to again every night. The pack & play was originally set up next to the bed, but it has since been taken down and put away since we never used it.

Aaron goes back to work on Monday, but his mom is flying in tomorrow to stay with us for a week, to help me out while I sort out this whole 2 under 2 thing. So far, in the few times I've been left alone with the boys, things have gone pretty smoothly. There was one giant Elliot meltdown when I was nursing Elliot and his cup needed to be refilled. He doesn't have a whole lot of patience- after all, he's used to his mama devoting 100% of her attention to him and getting whatever he wanted whenever he asked for it. He'll adjust.

let's talk about sleep {or lack thereof}

As you may recall, about a month or so ago, Elliot decided that he was "too big" to sleep with me anymore- and he let me know my screaming, kicking, punching, and pulling out clumps of my hair whenever I tried to get him to lay down with me. This pretty much broke my heart, because I love cosleeping! I got tired of fighting with him, though, so Elliot eventually got his way and started sleeping in his crib or pack & play.
So, you may be wondering, what are our nights like now? Well, Elliot goes to sleep around 9pm every night, right after he has his bath and a bottle. At one point, he was sleeping for a lovely four hour stretch until 1am, but, I'm sorry to say, he is now back to waking up every 2-3 hours again. I shouldn't complain too much- he never really fully wakes up. The minute he starts squirming and fussing, my hyper-active mommy sense kicks in and I jump up and make him a bottle. Five minutes later, Elliot is sound asleep again with a full belly.
Everyone keeps telling me that babies "his age" don't need night feedings anymore. Before you say it, yes, I have tried just getting him to go back to sleep without eating. Believe me when I say that it did NOT work. He got so worked up that his face turned bright purple and by the time I finally succumbed and gave him the bottle, he was so wide awake that he refused to go back to sleep, deciding instead to have a nice three-hour squeal-fest and playtime instead. If he didn't really "need" to eat in the middle of the night, he wouldn't gulp down six ounces in four minutes flat. His body is clearly telling him that he needs to eat- and I'm fine with that.
So, he still wakes up every 2-3 hours {usually two, not three} throughout the night. I'm so used to it by now that I don't even remember what a full night's rest feels like! Around 3 or 4am, I take him back to bed with me and he {happily!} sleeps with me until he wakes up for the day between 8 and 9am. He must be indecisive like his mama because he's suddenly decided that, hey, sleeping with his mama is pretty swell.
I call myself a part-time cosleeper. I'm really happy with it, because it's the best of both worlds- I still get some "me time" to sleep/do whatever by myself, but I also get my cuddle time with the little man later on. Because, who are we kidding? I wasn't ready to stop cosleeping. Those 2 or 3 weeks when he slept in his crib all night long just about killed me.
As far as I'm concerned, Elliot has his whole life to sleep through the night in his own bed like a big boy. For now, I'll enjoy the fact that he still depends on me while I still can!
PS: whoever said that cereal makes babies sleep longer, must be on crack. I haven't noticed any change whatsoever- and he gets a full bowl an hour before bed!

Sleep Update

Well, as I write this, Elliot is sleeping in his pack & play again. I suppose I should be thankful that he made the transition so easily, especially after hearing horror stories from bloggers/family members about how their kids were still sleeping in their beds at 3 or 4 years old. {Is it just me, or do all mothers like to try to scare the heebie jeebies out of new moms?!} But I'm still really missing having him in bed with me.
He slept in his pack & play ALL NIGHT last night. All I had to do was give him his bottle, rock him for a minute, pop in his pacifier, turn on his soothe & glow seahorse, and pat his back for a few minutes, and he was out.
Here's what our night looked like:
8:15pm: 4 oz bottle
8:30-11:00: sleep- 2 1/2 hours
11:00: 2.5 oz bottle
11:20-12:45: sleep- 1 hr 15 mins
12:45: bottle {3 ounces}
12:55-3:30: sleep- 2 hrs 35 mins
3:30: 3 oz bottle
4:00-6:00: sleep- 2 hrs
6:00: 3 oz bottle
6:15-7:45: sleep- 1 1/2 hrs
8:00 3 oz bottle
8:30-9:30 sleep- 1 hr
and then we woke up for the day.
So that means he only woke up for 6 feedings- that's not bad, for us! Whew, just reading over that... I feel like I should be exhausted, lol. Like I said, he's sleeping right now. He had a busy day today, meeting his Great Grandpa & Great Grandma Gougeon and spending time with his Grandma & Grandpa {I'll be posting pictures tomorrow}, so I wonder how he'll sleep tonight?
Thank you for all the wonderful comments on my last "sleeping" post. It really helps to hear that so many of you went through the same thing! It's nice to know I'm not alone. And yes, I do think Elliot is going through a growth spurt- he just started gobbling down 4 ounce bottles during the day!

Sleeping Troubles

It's no secret that Elliot isn't the best sleeper. He typically wakes up every 1-3 hours all night long. It wasn't so bad, though, because although he woke up often, he would gobble down his bottle and then go right back to sleep. It was easy!
Did you notice that I said it WAS easy instead of it IS easy? Yeah. That's because lately, neither Elliot or I have been getting much sleep. I now dread the hours between 3-8am, because during that time, my sweet, cuddly baby turns into a sleep-deprived monster. He kicks, pulls my hair, and SCREAMS. And not "woe is me, mommy cuddle me" crying... we're talking "I'm mad and I'm going to make sure the whole house knows it" SCREAMING. He won't eat {you have NO idea how much formula we've been wasting lately}, and he can't get comfortable in any of our usual positions. I tried rocking him, patting his back, singing, cuddling... the works. Nothing worked.
Last night, after trying to soothe him for three hours straight, I'd had enough. I decided to use a piece of advice one of our NICU nurses gave me awhile ago: if, after trying your best to soothe/comfort him, he was still super upset, to simply put him down for a bit and let him work it out himself. I'm 100% anti-Ferber, but if he was going to cry either way, why not put him in his pack & play?
So I laid him in his pack & play with his favorite blanket and turned on his soothe & glow seahorse. His screams rose another decibel, so I quietly patted his back. And wouldn't you know it? After a few minutes, he STOPPED crying and fell asleep! Paranoid, I stared at him for probably fifteen minutes until I was sure he was sleeping. Then, I crawled back into my bed, which suddenly felt lonely and empty, cried for a few minutes, and fell asleep. To my surprise, when Elliot woke up two hours later, at 8:00, he wasn't traumatized or upset... he was happily babbling away to the elephants on the pack & play's toy bar.
I'm trying to psyche myself up to try letting him sleep in his pack & play again tonight. I really, REALLY love cosleeping. There is just nothing better than cuddling with my little man all night long. But... It doesn't seem to be doing either of us any good anymore. Originally, I didn't want to transition him out of my bed until my husband came home, when he was 6 or 7 months old. But I guess sometimes plans change. :( I'm sad because this could be the end of another great time in my relationship with Elliot. I already had to stop breastfeeding... and now maybe cosleeping too?! Oh man. I'm not ready!!


Elliot sleeping peacefully in his pack & play

We ♥ Cosleeping

This is a post that I've wanted to do for awhile, but I wasn't sure how to start it. So here it goes:
We Cosleep. And we love it.
Truthfully, this wasn't exactly planned. Elliot's daddy and I had talked about cosleeping when we were pregnant, but then we found out about Elliot's condition and Aaron left for Korea. Every time we talked, we talked about gastroschisis and sonograms and doctor's appointments and our upcoming life in the NICU.
Then Elliot was born, and he spent the first six weeks of his life in the NICU, where we didn't get to do the things that most parents get to do with their newborns. And suddenly, six weeks later, he was home- and EXTREMELY constipated and cranky. The only way he would sleep was on my chest or while being held, so I started bringing him into the bed with me.
Almost a month later, he still sleeps with me every night. I have to say that I absolutely love it. At first, I was worried that I might roll over on top of him or something, but that thought never even crosses my mind anymore because {even though I'm asleep} I have this super-sensitive awareness of where he is/what he is doing at all times. It's hard to describe. I usually wake up the minute he starts squirming or rooting, which is wonderful because he doesn't fully wake up or start screaming, meaning we can both go back to sleep the minute he's finished his bottle.
Lately he likes to hold onto my shirt and bury his face into my neck while he's sleeping. It is so precious. There is nothing quite like falling asleep with your son cuddled up to you, breathing in that delicious baby smell, and listening to his rhythmic breathing. It's blissful.
For some reason, I always felt like I should be making up excuses or trying to get him to sleep on his own, like there was something wrong with it. But you know what I realized? Sleeping with your child is the most natural thing in the world. Why should I hide it? Cosleeping just works for us- plain and simple. I wouldn't change it for the world.

And you know what, while I'm at it, let's get it all out there in the open:
1. I believe in attachment parenting.
2. My son has never "cried it out" and he never will.
3. We formula feed. I struggled to breastfeed for eight weeks and {for many reasons} it didn't work out. I'm just now starting to be okay with it.
4. Our son is intact.
5. We cloth diaper and we LOVE it!

Some interesting articles I've found about cosleeping:
7 Benefits of Cosleeping
Ten Reasons to Sleep Next to Your Child at Night
Sleeping Safely with your Baby