Friday, April 30, 2010


One of my babycenter girls, Judy, made the picture pretty.
As planned, I woke up today and took another pregnancy test. To be honest, I really thought it would be negative. So imagine my shock when I checked the test after three minutes, and it was a VERY obvious POSITIVE! What does that mean? It means that in eight months, life as we know it will change. In eight months, Aaron and I will be parents. I will be a MOMMY! The thought still blows me away. I can't believe we conceived on the VERY first cycle of actively trying. After reading about all of these wonderful couples who try for months and months, I was beginning to think it would take all summer (or more!). But here I am, 4 weeks and 2 days pregnant. It almost seems too good to be true. I am so incredibly thankful, though. I feel so blessed.
My EDD is 1/5/11. What a great way to ring in the new year- with a new baby to love. And in SOUTH KOREA, too. Wow.

Thursday, April 29, 2010


A beautiful song by U2 specially written for the movie "Brothers," which was nominated for two golden globes. As an army wife who nearly lost her husband in Iraq (he was shot in the head by a sniper), this song really hits home for me. Not to mention the movie. If you haven't seen Brothers, I highly recommend you watch it. It accurately portrays the problems many soldiers face as they struggle with PTSD and coming home. I am so glad that my husband will not be returning to Iraq or Afghanistan anytime soon. And I feel so blessed to still have him here with me, as we take this journey together and hopefully start a family soon. He will be a wonderful father.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


Well, today didn't start off badly. In fact, I tested this morning and got a light pink line, which my husband and I thought looked like a positive. So I went to my physical in a genuinely hopeful, positive mood. Well, when I told the nurse that I might be pregnant, she said something along the lines of, "God. Here you come walking in here in your cute little sundress, looking about 13, and then you tell me that you might be PREGNANT." Yes, you read that right. She told me I looked like I was thirteen years old. Excuse me? I'm pretty sure I don't look prepubescent, thankyou-very-much. Well, when I explained where I was at in my cycle, she kept saying it was probably too early to test and that she really doubted I was pregnant. (Cuz, you know... apparently she could tell just by LOOKING at me...) But eventually she agreed to do a pregnancy test. After I peed in a cup and waited a few minutes, she proudly came back with a huge grin on her face and proclaimed, "NEG-A-TIVEEE!" I made it very clear that I was actually hoping I was pregnant. Yet she still rubbed the prognosis in my face and didn't even bother tiptoeing around my feelings.
When the doctor finally came in, she said they'd do a blood test Monday if I still hadn't gotten my period. SO I GET TO WAIT EVEN LONGER, yay me. Not. Even though I know that it could've been too early for the test to pick anything up, and that I have a good chance of still being pregnant... I'm really losing hope.
So thanks, Ms. Insensitive Nurse, for ruining my day. Oh yeah, and thanks for doing that pap smear that I really need for my command sponsorship paperwork... NOT. For some reason she decided to schedule that for Tuesday instead of just doing it while I was there. Makes a lot of sense, huh?

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Oh joy.

At my overseas physical tomorrow, I'll be pricked and poked and papped and... all that other fun stuff. A full gynecological and physical exam. All in the name of moving overseas in less than three months. I'm not too thrilled about the exam itself- I have a retroverted cervix and uterus, so pap smears are incredibly uncomfortable (borderline painful) for me. I am, however, excited to be able to cross another item off of my "Move-to-Korea" checklist.
They'll be doing a lot of bloodwork. So hopefully I'll find out tomorrow whether or not I'm pregnant. Tomorrow is the 30th day of my cycle and 13 days past ovulation- and my period will officially be due. I'm still keeping my fingers crossed, although I'm not feeling as optimistic anymore, after that negative test yesterday. I was also having some cramping last night and thought for sure the red bitch was coming, but actually, I think my stomach was just upset.

Monday, April 26, 2010

Lesson Learned.

Trying to Conceive Lesson #567: Don't test early.
Just don't do it. Especially if your cycles tend to fluctuate and you aren't 100% positive when you ovulated. Trust me.
I woke up today and the box of First Result Early Response tests were calling to me. I reminded myself, no, it's too early to test. And the FRER box replied, "but you COULD get a positive. It happens. Wouldn't that be the BEST way to start off the day?" It all seemed to fit together- I'd just woken up with a full bladder, I had three tests waiting for me (would I really miss just one?), and that box is such a seducing shade of hot pink, how could I really resist? So, I tested. And a full three minutes later, the test lay in the garbage with only one pink line and I left the bathroom in a considerably worse mood than when I'd entered.
I know that most women don't get positives until closer to (or after) the scheduled arrival of their periods. And many, many people get negatives (more than once!) before getting a positive. So I will just keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best. No matter what, I refuse to test again until Friday, when my period is due. But now I'm starting to wonder if maybe all of these supposed symptoms are either imagined or just the byproduct of some nasty bug that I caught.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

The Big Ten.

According to Baby Center, the top ten pregnancy symptoms are:

10. Tender, swollen breasts
9. Fatigue
8. Implantation bleeding
7. Nausea or vomiting
6. Increased sensitivity to odors
5. Abdominal bloating
4. Frequent urination
3. A missed period
2. Your basal body temperature stays high
1. PROOF: a positive home pregnancy test

Well... I'm on day 27 of my cycle (which is usually 29 days long) and it's been 10 days since I ovulated. And I have about half of these symptoms. Most notably fatigue, bloating, nausea, and frequent urination. Seriously, I look about three months pregnant (but its just water weight) and I have absolutely no energy. I could sleep all day, even though I normally hate naps. And don't even get me started on how many times I have to get up to go to the bathroom. My temperature just spiked up AGAIN today, up to 98.48 from my baseline, which is 97.5 unless it's cold out. No, I'm being serious. I have Reynaud's syndrome, which is a blood circulation disease, and my hands and feet lose virtually all blood flow and turn white, limp, and puffy.
Well... I'm hoping that all of these are good signs. Although I would be really surprised if I were pregnant ALREADY... we haven't tried nearly as long as most. But still. A girl can dream, right?

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Gotta have it!

Everyone's heard of of the original "What to Expect". But what about before you're expecting? Well, they've got that covered, too. This book is nicely categorized and easy to read. It covers everything from pre-conception health and nutrition to making a baby and fertility problems. Heidi spares no details and answers even the questions you're too embarrassed to ask aloud. You'll probably find yourself laughing along the way.
My favorite part? The book features grey "For Dads Only" boxes on almost every topic. Even though your man won't be the one carrying the baby for nine months, he still makes a huge contribution (50%, afterall) to that new baby of yours. So you should make sure he's in tip-top baby making shape as well.
I loved this book and I think you will too.

What I've learned so far.

"This is our first month actively TTC. As far as I can tell, DH and I timed our BD perfectly for O. I'm currently on CD26 and 9DPO. KMFX for a BFP!!"
Confused? When I first began exploring the world of trying to conceive online, I was dumbfounded by all of the acronyms and abbreviations. It was like they were speaking a secret foreign language! I was nervous to even ask what they meant, for fear of looking like a complete idiot. To save you from that fate (and don't worry, I will NOT be speaking like this in this blog... I personally don't like abbreviations) here is that super secret language, explained :)

TTC: Trying to conceive
DH/DBF/DF/SO: Husband, Boyfriend, Fiancee, Significant Other
BD: Baby dance, aka sex
CD: Cycle day
DPO: Days past ovulation
O: Ovulation
CM: Cervical mucus
BFP: Big fat positive (pregnancy test)
BFN: Big fat negative (pregnancy test)
MC: Miscarriage
KMFX: Keeping my fingers crossed
Rainbow baby: Pregnancy after a baby/pregnancy loss

And here are some wonderful resources for those trying to conceive (or thinking about it):
Baby Center
American Pregnancy Association
Fertility Friend
What to Expect Before You're Expecting

What else have I learned? Trying to get pregnant is NOT as easy as most would have us believe. If you were one of those starry-eyed little girls who covered her notebooks with doodles of their dream husband and five (or eight, or ten...) stick figure babies, you're not alone. As young girls, we are led to believe that someday, our prince will come, quickly followed by a dream wedding and tons of babies. As we all know, this is not the case. When that mysterious dream man finally makes his grand appearance (and who knows how “perfect” he’ll really be), and when you both decide to begin your family- you may be in for a world of disappointment. I had no idea there was so much to do. I, like most people, thought that hey, we were both young and healthy, so making a baby should be a piece of cake, right? Wrong. Most young couples our age are in for several months of actively trying (typically less than six but often up to twelve). And if you face fertility problems, you can expect to try harder and longer.
So, Aaron and I are doing all that we can right now, while still trying to keep our sanity. Trying to conceive is VERY stressful. Although we desperately want a baby, we won’t be totally crushed if it doesn’t happen this (or next) month. For now, we’re just settling in for the ride. And someday, when we do end up conceiving, we will be that much more thankful!

Friday, April 23, 2010

New beginnings.

Well hi there!
Time for the obligatory introduction.
So you know what you're getting yourself into: I'm Jess. I'm an enthusiastic, outgoing, 20-something redhead with a love for the environment, nature, and animals. I'm a little obsessed with organizing and cleaning (no really- my closet is color coordinated). I'm stubborn and opinionated and will sometimes be tempted to go on long rants about things I'm passionate about (animals, breast feeding, baby-led weaning, cloth diapering, attachment parenting...). And I'm pretty longwinded. Think you can handle that? Ok, good.
I married my highschool sweetheart on August 4th, 2009 (don't worry, we took a year off to "explore" at one point) and have been enjoying the ups and down of the army lifestyle ever since. So far, there have been unexpected cross-country moves, promises made and promises broken, laughs, tears, and plenty of smiles. It's not always rainbows and sunshine, but hey, that's just how life is. My husband and I support each other through thick and thin. I've known him for eight years now, and he is the best friend I could ever ask for.
After much discussion, we made the decision to begin actively trying to start our family in March of 2010. Not too long after, we received the exciting (and somewhat shocking!) news that we will be moving to Camp Casey, South Korea in July. SURPRISE! So... it looks like our TTC (and pregnancy) journey will be much more eventful than what we'd originally thought. I'm a little nervous about possibly being pregnant and giving birth in a foreign country, but I'm also very excited. My husband and I have decided not to let our move change our plans.
This blog will mostly chronicle the bumpy road of trying to conceive and the new opportunities and challenges along the way as we settle into our new home overseas. Hopefully, it will soon transition to a pregnancy blog and then (the best part!) a full blown baby blog. I have lots of fun ideas and things in store, so stay tuned!
Oh, and this is my hubby and I, on our wedding day: